It’s February 14th. You know what day it is?
Singles Awareness Day.
But don’t get S.A.D. Get even. In ink 😉
Helen has a big signing at her local B&N today, and we managed to catch her beforehand for a quick interview. Here’s a snippet:
Fuse Literary: What is your favorite romantic comedy?
Helen Wrath: YOUNG FRANKENSTEIN
FL: What is your favorite sharp object?
HW: My tongue.
FL: What was the worst date you’ve ever been on?
HW: In college a young man invited me back to his room for a glass of wine. I was impressed until he asked- “Strawberry or peach Boone’s Farm?”. He also asked if I wanted to hold his gun- not a euphemism.
FL: Does the bastard have any idea what he missed out on?
HW: I’m glad it was just one date.
FL: What’s your favorite prank?
HW: I coated my hand in rubber cement, balled up that fist and put it inside one of our library’s puppets. Then, I found an unsuspecting, germaphobic co-worker and gasped “What is inside of this puppet?!” and pulled my hand out.
FL: What’s your favorite excuse when the cops show up?
HW: Who needs an excuse with a body like this?
FL: You wrote a book about getting revenge on your X. Is it a memoir?
HW: To protect the innocent, mainly me, I plead the 5th.
FL: Is it true that a pig farm is a great way to dispose of a body? Asking for a friend.
HW: No, but it’s an ideal place for a second date. Tell your “friend”- Quarry pits.
FL: Does hell have a fury like a woman scorned?
HW: Hell wishes.
FL: Grab the book nearest to you, and turn to page 65. The first sentence describes your love life.
HW: “Draw X in a passionate embrace with this prickly cactus.” From DRAW WITH A VENGEANCE: Get Even In Ink and Let Karma Handle the Rest by Helen Wrath. Huh, guess the Universe is telling me to shave more often.
FL: Chocolate or flowers (or whiskey)?
HW: Is chocolate-whiskey a thing? If not, it should be.
FL: Where can we find you?
HW: Barnes & Noble in Rochester, MI today from 2-3. You can DRAW WITH A VENGEANCE with the chance to win Sweet Revenge chocolate!